Ask Me Anything - July 31, 2020
This is the fourth Ask Me Anything here on the website, moving it over from Instagram. I’ll get things started with a few questions shared from Instagram, and please include your new questions in the discussion below!
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What are your thoughts on going back to school?
I don’t have a universal answer because every city, state, and school is SO different. Rho’s school has been incredibly communicative with us about their plans (which are very detailed and well thought out) and I feel comfortable sending him back.
Tips for eliminating forehead shine on video calls without makeup?
I love Supergoop’s Mattescreen for my daily SPF in the summer, and a spritz of Urban Decay’s De-Slick removes shine in a snap.
What light (if any) do you use for reading in bed at night?
Opinions on blue light glasses?
I’ve found that my eyes are less tired at the end of the day when I wear them. I also have glaucoma, so my ophthalmologist recommended I wear them regularly.
I just got this pair from Look Optic and they’re the most comfortable ones I own.
How do you research more about candidates for city and state elections?
Local newspapers are a great place to start. Ballotpedia also has a robust local politics portal that is really solid.
Would you consider doing a lecture series for young women who want your take?
In a post-COVID world, absolutely! Right now, my time is pretty stretched between work and family.
If it were safe to travel anywhere right now, where would you go?
Amangiri. We had booked our 10 year anniversary trip there for April. I still fantasize about the property and can’t wait to go…one day.
What made you decide it was time to return home to NYC?
Our caregivers felt comfortable returning to work and New York had just entered Phase 4 of re-opening.
We also really missed home. A lot.
Have you read any of Cal Newport’s books? Thoughts?
I read Deep Work and did have some solid takeaways from it. But I take great issue with Cal’s utter lack of home/family-related work, which I presume falls to his wife. If I had someone taking care of every element of my home and the heavy lift of raising the kids, I’d be able to devote so many hours to deep work.
I think Laura VanderKam is a lot more relatable and has stronger solutions for my life.
I loved your dress in the 7/14 talk with KSL. Source?
It’s last year’s infamous #amazonnightgown! You can read all about the trend here.
Any recommendations for safe/socially distanced kid activities in NYC right now?
We just got back and have been staying home, so I got nothing. BUT my friend Megan has 3 kids and stayed in NYC the entire time, and she’s been sharing amazing family adventures on her Instagram.
Help! How can we get mail in ballots in Texas? I don’t want to stand in line inside.
Here are all the details for absentee voting for Texas!
Are you still using Todoist? How do you use it?
I am not, sadly. It became just one more thing to stay on top of. But Victoria’s post on how she uses it is incredibly helpful!
Have a favorite song from TS8?
the last great american dynasty! I have listened to it on repeat more times than I will confess to.
How to approach someone to be your mentor?
I have a podcast episode on that exact topic!
Some of your favorite romance books?
SO SO MANY! But here are my favorites:
Everything Jasmine Guillory has ever written (but start with The Wedding Date)
Alyssa Cole’s Reluctant Royals series (book #1 is A Princess In Theory)
Farrah Rochon’s The Boyfriend Project
Abby Jimenez’s The Happily Ever After Playlist
Talia Hibbert’s Get A Life, Chloe Brown
Casey McQuiston’s Red, White, & Royal Blue
These three books by Kennedy Ryan: The Kingmaker, The Rebel King, Queen Move
Alexa Martin’s Intercepted
How are you adjusting to being back home?
I’m struggling to re-establish my routine. My husband’s and my work schedules are still a little erratic and I’ve been up late working every night because I’m spending time with the kids during the day getting them settled. I’m trying to be kind with myself.
If I’m being honest, I feel like I’m bad at work and motherhood right now, and just failing left and right.
Am I obligated to tell my employer I’m starting grad school? (scared of layoffs)
Every employer has their own rules, so you should revisit the employee handbook and see what the rules are!
Are you guys having your nanny come over? If so, what precautions are you taking?
We are. She wears gloves, a mask, and a face shield on the subway and she changes into a clean outfit when she gets here. The subways have never been cleaner, so she feels comfortable commuting to us.
Recommendations on career books (for women), especially on how to communicate effectively.
Fran Hauser’s The Myth Of The Nice Girl. It’s excellent and a book I re-read every year.
Advice for trusting your company after layoffs (non-COVID related)
I think this tweet sums it up better than I ever could.
Any courses you’d recommend for starting a side hustle? (Not the idea itself, the admin part?)
I recommend Olivia’s Zero To Freelance and How To Pitch (Your Ass Off), and The Jojotastic School of Social Media.
Time to ditch the Real Housewives completely or start fresh with a younger, less drunk cast
I am OBSESSED with Beverly Hills this season. I’m very ready for a fresh start in New York, and I’m excited about the upcoming Salt Lake City season!
Have you ever been through pregnancy loss? Or know resources to help cope?
I had a miscarriage between Rho and Rhaki, and wrote about it in detail.
Natalist (one of my portfolio companies) has published some of the most helpful and thoughtful posts on miscarriage.
What are you reading?
I just finished This Is My America (incredible, I highly recommend), and just started One Of Us Is Lying (books were gifted by the publisher). YA is one of the only genres my brain can handle right now.
Hi! Totally random, do you have any collagen recommendations?
I tried Vital Proteins a few years back, but didn’t see much of a difference. I do know other people that swear by the brand, so it might be worth a try!
For skincare, I focus on products that boost my skin’s collagen production. Here are the products I use:
Retinoid - Wander Beauty Do Not Disturb (code HITHA15 gives you 15% off your order. I am a #WanderPartner, and receive a commission on purchases where the code is used)
Exfoliating acids - I alternate between Alpha H’s Liquid Gold and The Ordinary’s 5% Lactic Acid + HA
Vitamin C - I’m currently using Skin Design’s Vitamin C Antioxidant Glow serum, but I also have used and liked Sunday Riley’s CEO oil, Peter Thomas Roth’s Potent-C, and SkinCeuticals CE Ferulic. If you’re going to splurge on a skincare product, make it your vitamin C. It degrades rapidly, and all of these products have among the best stability and packaging to preserve it that I’ve observed.
Disclosure - I was gifted Alpha H’s Liquid Gold and Skin Design’s vitamin C serum through Haldi, a very cool startup that makes specific recommendations based on on your current skincare routine and skin goals, while keeping the products you love and ditching the ones that are formulated with Ingredient Offenders. I love the products and the full skincare routine they recommended, and I’ve seen a definite improvement in my skin tone, texture, and a reduction in my blackheads. Give it a try here, and use my name in the referral to get access (Hitha Palepu).
What would you say to people who believe a COVID vaccine won’t be safe?
Our country exists because of vaccination.
Science has come a long way in the past 300 years. A COVID vaccine will likely require multiple doses for enough inoculation to provide immunity, but it will work.
Did you sleep train your boys?
With Rho, we tried everything and eventually had to let him cry-it-out for a couple of nights. With Rhaki, we had a couple of rough nights when we got back to New York, but he’s back to sleeping like a champ.
If you need sleep training help, I recommend Bonne Nuit Baby. Other people RAVE about Taking Cara Babies’ sleep course as well.
What is your nighttime routine with the boys?
Our nanny gives both boys their baths, and Sri and I each take a kid and alternate the next night. On weekends, we bathe the boys together, brush their teeth, and climb into Rho’s bed for a few books. Then one of us takes Rhaki to his room, and the other stays with Rho.
Click & Grow vs Aerogarden?
I went with the Click & Grow purely for aesthetic purposes. This article does a nice job of breaking down the differences and pros/cons between the two!
Alchimie sale - what should I stock up on?
I use the Pigment Lightening serum and the both eye products every day (gel in the morning, balm at night), and the Kantic Brightening Mask twice a week.
I read 'The Wedding Date' in early 2019 and LOVED it...but! are the rest of Jasmine's books meant to be read in a particular order? I don't want to mess with her intended story flow.